Perspective - Story & Art by Sandra Russell

"Perspective" by Sandra Russell

 

Perspective

Story and Art by Sandra Russell

When I was in my mid-twenties I decided to go back to college and finish a degree. I was working in the ceramics lab for a summer "work study" job and had three coworkers I became friends with. This socialization was important to me as I had a young child and was in and out of a miserable marriage...well not really out of it, but something not quite a marriage as we would like to think of one.

One day towards the end of my stint and the last time I saw one of my coworkers, he called out to me in the parking lot as we were both leaving. He said, "Keep a Perspective". I had no idea how to translate what he meant. I knew the art term perspective as applied to drawing, painting and sculpture; but that couldn't be what he meant? I knew him to be a thoughtful, and businesslike fellow, and so thought he carefully chose that word to say goodbye to me. I respected that but was still in the dark.

You see I was in the throes of a gaslighting situation, one where the partner increasingly erodes ones will and self-confidence by planting doubts and inserting innuendo and blame in inappropriate ways. They also go behind your back and influence family members and friends who might support you by planting stories and feign worry about your mental health.

Well, how does one get a perspective then when drowning in such fog? I went to professionals just to see if I was crazy or not? I went to a physical Dr. for a routine exam, and he was very suspicious of abuse, which surprised me. That's how lost I was...another allergy Dr. came up with a similar reaction. I went to a lawyer for advice and he said get out - run. Well, I did all those things, and still it took a very long time to understand what my friend meant by "Keep a Perspective".

I hope that any of you who can't find the lines, the apparent distance because the atmosphere is just too thick, will benefit from this tale and find the help that is out there if you aren't afraid to look like a fool.